Government insists travellers wishing to enter the UK must have their head examined

3 weeks ago
17 Views

UK arrivals need head checked

Foreign travellers stupid enough to want to come to the UK may need to have their head examined for before being allowed entry, it has been revealed today.

With infection levels now completely off the scale across the whole country and with a shambolic bumbling government currently in charge of dealing with the issue, travellers hoping to enter the UK will now need a full psychological examination prior to being given entry, to ensure that they are not in fact, just completely fucking mental.

A spokesman for the government confirmed earlier, “Yes we need to be really careful here.

“We are going to have to test every single person who actually wants to come into the UK right now to make sure that they are not actually a total fucking lunatic.

“It’s obvious that we are handling this thing extremely badly indeed. The infection rate is through the roof and we have no idea what we are doing rule wise from one day to the next”

“We would therefore be very concerned about anybody who actually wants to come here of their own accord and will to have their head examined to ensure that they are not a complete and utter maniac.

“We are of course expecting a few dark tourists, and the odd thrill-seeker will still want to come here, but mostly it will just be lunatics.”

Asked if people will also be tested for coronavirus we were told, “Erm…. Yes, I suppose we could do. Bit soon to start with all that though isn’t it? Relax.”

Let’s block ads! (Why?)

NewsThump

Comments

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Translate »