Here are 25 of the funniest tweets we’ve seen over the last seven days. We hope you like them as much as we did.
Retweet your favourites, follow the funny people, spread the joy.
I feel like this match is either going to end in a knockout or a quiche. pic.twitter.com/7WCjaaZsV5
— Daniel Maier (@danielmaier) July 26, 2020
The hotel told me that the old potting shed round the back was a fully functional modern sauna. I had to admire their hut spa.
— David Quantick (@quantick) July 28, 2020
I wanted to become a vet but failed the exam on treating bullet wounds of wanted criminals at 4am
— Seán Burke (@SeanBurkeShow) July 28, 2020
[English language convention]
America: the U in colour and flavour is unnecessary. We vote that it be dropped. What say you, Britain?
— Pessimus Prime (@BigJDubz) July 25, 2020
who’s your fav Disney Princess? Mine is the Italian chef who made an entire candlelit meal for two stray dogs and then serenaded them until they kissed
— ditch pony (@molly7anne) July 25, 2020
You know, there is one thing I envy about “Goth” people. They never have to separate their clothes on laundry day.
— Tyrannees (@tyrannees) July 25, 2020
I really want my baby daughter to play with gender-appropriate toys. Does anyone know where I can get her a mini glass ceiling?
— Brona C. Titley (@bronactitley) July 26, 2020
instant noodles scooby-doo praying
— ꧁꧂ (@drivingmemadi) July 25, 2020
That moment of horror when Facebook crops your logo. pic.twitter.com/Slbau3Mua6
— Angry People in Local Newspapers (@angrypiln) July 26, 2020
Really pleased hasbro are finally releasing the long awaited action figure of Noel Edmonds pic.twitter.com/tfqWfWrzKN
— Dan McKee (@danieljmckee) July 27, 2020
good afternoon pic.twitter.com/YX6ZLTmgeS
— Taffy Brodesser-Akner (@taffyakner) July 27, 2020
No one’s taking my phone calls anymore. Beginning to regret changing my name to Spam Risk.
— Michael McKean (@MJMcKean) July 27, 2020